James Harrison IS ABSOLUTELY-POSITIVELY-HANDS DOWN- F***ING NUTS!!

Bob on 02 5, 2009

It is only a matter of time until James Harrison kills someone. We strive to keep it ‘PG-13’ here at Bareknucks, meaning we try to shy away from the ‘F bomb,’ but my god, THIS GUY IS ABSOLUTELY-POSITIVELY-HANDS DOWN- FUCKING NUTS!!

When I say ‘kill,’ I’m not talking about lighting someone up on the football field; it’s more along the lines of a Chris Benoit. Before you comment on how it is out of line to bring up Benoit’s rampage, because I know there are at least a couple of you out there, let’s remember that it indeed happened, and I’m not going to sugarcoat anything.

Harrison is an absolute ANIMAL on the football field and is more than deserving of his Defensive Player of the Year Award. His 100 yard interception for a TD in the Super Bowl was one of the more impressive/oddly-frightening football plays I’ve ever seen.

After making a great play, he followed it up with a ridiculous unsportsmanlike penalty. In case you missed it http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nG9GXtr9rpY,(the quality is not great, but it was the best video I could find). The scary thing is that this animal is not confined within the sidelines. Many of us are familiar with his domestic violence incident this year. Following an argument, his wife supposedly locked herself in the bathroom to call the cops. Harrison busted the door down, snapped her cell phone in half and wound back and smacked her in the face.

It is clear that there’s a missing link with this dude. I don’t want to make false accusations of steroid use, but I can’t possibly be the only one that has looked at this madman and thought “hmm…something’s not right with this guy.” He is absolutely huge, and certainly possesses some of the symptoms which are associated with ‘roid-rage.’

Harrison’s size and maniacal edge is an awfully precarious combination. Don’t be surprised if you turn on ESPN one day and see a disturbing Breaking News Alert.

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  • TheGrimReaper
    Wow!! ...Just wow!

    Your penchant for sordid extrapolations is truly stupefying, Bob.
    You really know how to connect the dots now don't you. How
    Extraordinary! Is this an ability you've been working really hard on?

    Like you mention Bob, many here will say that to flippantly associate
    Harrison with the unfortunate and morbid events surrounding Mr. Benoit is
    simply surreal and reprehensible, but not I. Like you, I also think that
    "Harrison is an absolute ANIMAL", though I'd choose to call him a beast
    but of course, never to his face.

    Many will also criticize you for lacing your article with inflammatory words like
    "madman", 'kill', "ANIMAL", "missing link" 'maniacal' and "rampage". Sure they
    may be shameless and regrettable, but I admire a man who is able to face his fears
    and lay them out for the world to see.

    Let's not sugar coat things Bob, you obviously have deep-seeded fears
    with regards to Mr.Harrison, but that is both rational and understandable.
    I mean who wouldn't? James Harrison is one Bad Man!!!

    I have to wonder about the origins of your fears though, do they stem
    from the fear that the Cards' Francisco showed on that play? or is it
    something much more personal and frightening? Has Deebo been visiting you
    in your slumber and causing you these night terrors? If so, now you know
    what keeps opposing QBs up at night. Surely, it is not I.

    Fear the Deebo, Bob. Bar your doors and windows, look under your bed at night,
    and keep the lights on because you never know when he'll unleash his 'maniacal'
    blood thirst upon thee now that you have undoubtedly pissed him off.

    As your biggest fan Bob, I'll be relentlessly spying for any 'disturbing Breaking News
    Alerts' that may notify me that your health and sanity are in peril.

    Yours with admiration,
    TheGrimReaper
    (who always looks under his bed and lays awake at night fearing The Deebo)
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