The Amazing Detroit Lions

on 02 7, 2009

It was quite an accomplishment for the New England Patriots to go undefeated in the regular season last year, a difficult achievement to say the least, but one that seems plausible.  On the contrary, the Detroit Lions managed to go DEFEATED this season.  Not a single victory.  0 wins and 16 straight losses.  A defeated season seems much more implausible than an undefeated season.

These are professional athletes, the crème de la crème.  They are paid large sums of money to play the game of football.  Football is their job; it is their source of income.  The field is their office.  It’s hard to fathom that an assembled team of professional football players failed to taste victory at least once throughout the duration of the NFL season.  There have been some god awful football teams, but they have all managed to avoid the humiliation and shame of finishing a 16 game season defeated (1976 expansion Tampa Bay Buccaneers went 0-14).  However, the 2008 Detroit Lions managed to pull it off.  The members of this historic squad should be demoralized.  They have to live with themselves for the rest of their lives knowing that they were the first team in NFL history to go 0-16.  Defeated, in essence, entirely owned in all aspects.  If the ’08 Lions were in prison, they’d be taking it from a guy named Big Bubba.  He’d steal their food, take their money and on top of that, Big Bubba would get a knobber afterwards, without any struggle or fight from the depleted Lions.  Haha OK, you get the point.

Anyways, it is comprehensible that a team of players and coaches could function so well together and be so cohesive that they would not lose a game the entire regular season.  I just don’t understand how a team could be so rotten, so sloppy and so out of tune that they could not win a game the entire regular season.  You would think they’d have Lady Luck on their side at least once, that the ball could bounce their way 1 out of 16 times.  Negative.  What about the players’ pride?  You couldn’t grind one win out to save yourself some dignity?  I’d have that team fired up; playing like it was the Super Bowl of Super Bowls every week.  You’ve got to come across a team where you want it more than they do, don’t you?  I’m afraid not.

This is the goddamned NFL, these guys are privileged to be a part of such an organization.  Get it together.  This isn’t the Bad News Bears folks; this is a PROFESSIONAL football team.  If you want to run around like a bunch of clowns go join the circus (Dan Orlovsky’s infamous safety).  The 2008 Lions go against everything I believe in about sports.  They lack that drive, that determination, an urgency to win and that sentiment of never wanting to experience the feeling of defeat ever again.  I’m at a loss of words.  What a train wreck of a season.

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